Inner turmoil

Something is bothering me. I can't quite pinpoint the source. I find myself drifting away in thought throughout the day no matter the company. There's a great feeling of sadness within me though I have no reason to be.

In a conversation with him today my eyes began to burn and I felt the twinge before a tear slipped from my eye and fell before him. It was the first of many. There was nothing I could do to make them stop. I excused myself to the washroom where I glared at my reflection, mentally demanding the tears to cease. After flushing my face with cold water I had finally regained control of my lacrimal ducts.

Silly little things bring me to the edge of tears. I feel everything right now. I could blame it on hormone levels. I truly think there's something more than a womanly flux of chemicals, though. My nights are frequently sleepless. I've spent many hours planning murals for my ceiling during the hours I should be dreaming.

In the past month I've sorted through dozens of problems for others. It's so much easier helping others than it is to exam one's self. I feel that I may have forgotten how to take a step back. Step away from myself and look objectively on to see wherein the problem lies.

I'll figure it out. Hopefully soon. Or it will be the death of me.